Hey, Camp Enthusiasts!

Parents, today I’m discussing a very important topic about summer camp: knowing whether your kid is ready for it or not. This can be a little tricky to figure out since there isn’t any exact answer or age I can give you for your camper. Everyone’s different. What I can give you is some pointers to figuring out if your kid is ready or not.SummerCampHandbook.com thinks that seven is a good age to start, so long as your child feels comfortable with it by that point. Maybe your child is an early bloomer and was ready for it just before turning seven. Maybe your child won’t be ready until middle-school. How do you know?

Usually it’s best to leave it up to your kid to mention any interest in summer camp. Kids know what’s fun and that camp is cool.

If you think summer camp would be a good idea, yet your kid hasn’t brought it up freely, see if there’s a reason that they aren’t interested. Whether the reason be related to anxieties about making friends at camp or concerns over leaving home, make sure to address your child’s issue and not simply encourage him or her to go. Camp can be your idea, but it’s got to be your kid’s decision.

Try having your kid talk to a friend who’s already been to camp or get permission to visit a camp while in session. Both are very effective methods of easing your child’s mind about a stay at camp.

If you’re concerned about homesickness settling in, a care package is always a great way to lift your kid’s spirit. Also, remember to write! Everything Summer Camp has stationery for kids and stationery for you to make writing letters home and to camp easy and convenient.

You can also get cool and colorful name labels at Everything Summer Camp that were featured in the News recently by Nola Baby. Every camp wants everything to be labeled so that what gets brought to camp returns home. It also helps the camps that provide a laundry service to make sure the right clothing goes to the right camper.

Once your kid has decided to go to summer camp, then you just have to know how long of a stay it should be. Luckily, your kid should have a big say on this one too.

As Chris Thurber recently wrote in his March 13 post on this blog about figuring out how long to stay at camp, it “should be largely up to your child. Ownership over the decision about how many weeks to attend camp goes a long way toward promoting good adjustment to the separation from home.”

That’s all for today. Good luck, Parents. As always, thanks for reading.

- John

How Kids Answer this Perennial Question Might Surprise You

Let’s reveal the most surprising fact first: Having a friend from home at camp does nothing to diminish the intensity of homesickness. Although everyone experiences feelings of missing home, only 20% of boys and girls between the ages of 8 and 16 are bothered by these feelings. Surprisingly, having a friend from home attend camp at the same time does not determine whether a child is in the mild or moderate homesickness group.

There are probably several reasons for this. First, if a child is intensely homesick, he or she is likely missing his parents most of all. The friend from home is not an adequate substitute. Fun, yes, but simply not mom or dad.

Second, if a child his having a tough time with the adjustment to summer camp, he or she is likely to be struggling socially. At camp, that boils down to making new friends. Having an established friendship from home may be a temporary comfort, but it’s the rare friend who takes an active role in garnering new connections for a lonely peer.

Third, if a child is struggling to fit in, he or she may not be much fun to play with. Children are most attracted to happy peers, not dour ones. Moreover, it’s a tall order to say to one child, “Your pal is feeling sad and left out. Stop having fun and do what you can to connect him with the rest of the group.” Some mature and astute children can do this kind of social engineering; most can’t.

All of this is simply to say that signing up for camp with a friend from home does nothing to stave off feelings of homesickness and may do little to promote social adjustment. However, for those children whose adjustment to camp is generally smooth, it may be lots of fun to share camp with an established chum. It may also be wonderful to share memories of camp with a local buddy. In sum, a friend from home may be a pleasant addition to a camp experience, but it’s not an antidote to anything.

Finally, when it comes to attending camp with a friend, parents should involve their child in the decision. Like so many other big and small choices, giving children some ownership over the parameters of their experience promotes good adjustment.

Curiously, the number-one thing that children say they love about camp is not the friends or the activities. Those are the number two and number three assets, respectively. What young people say they love most is that at camp they get to be themselves. In part, this means young people get to shed the reputation they have at school and in the neighborhood—maybe even at home, too—and let more of their authentic personality shine.

Sometimes, shedding an old reputation and donning a new personality is hampered by reminders and trappings of home, including the presence of an established friend. For this reason, many young people prefer to attend a camp where no one else from their grade or school is present. Talk with your son or daughter to get a sense of where they stand on the issue. Their answer may surprise you...

Of course, if the staff are doing their job, every child will have some new friends within a few hours of arriving. And if your child’s experience is typical, some of those new friendships will last a lifetime.

Enjoy the summer!

Dr. Christopher Thurber

What Goldilocks Can Teach Us about How Long to Stay at Camp?

Goldilocks did three things right when selecting her preferred chair, porridge and bed: She kept an open mind, she experimented and she was involved in making her own choices. Wise parents adopt the Goldilocks model when deciding on session length. Let’s talk through each of these three factors.

First, you and your child should keep an open mind. Some eight-year-olds are ready for a seven-week stay; some 14-year-olds will struggle with a two-week stay. Generally speaking, younger children and first-year campers begin with shorter session lengths (one or two-weeks) and build up to a month or more. However, there are plenty of exceptions. Ultimately, you’re trying match the camp and session length to your child’s interests, abilities and developmental level, rather than link any parameter of his or her stay to chronological age.

Second, experiment a bit. Arrange for your child to spend a few overnights and long weekends with friends or relatives. Let them get a sense of what they miss. (Everyone misses something.) Talk with them after this practice time away from home about how they coped with their normal pangs of homesickness. Coach them on the best ways to adjust to the separation from home. If they claim to have sailed through the separation with nary a thought of home, they are probably lying but still showing healthy confidence.

(Note: Most parents are committed to preventing severe homesickness. That’s why the American Camp Association created a 25-minute homesickness prevention DVD. The Secret Ingredients of Summer Camp Success is actually a DVD-CD set that lowers the intensity of first-year campers’ homesickness by 50%, on average. Consider making this $10 investment in your child’s happiness. The set is for sale on EverythingSummerCamp.com or by calling (800) 535-2057.)

Third, involve your son or daughter in the decision about how long to stay at camp. Some of the choice will be dictated by family finances, of course. Whatever flexibility is left should be largely up to your child. Ownership over the decision about how many weeks to attend camp goes a long way toward promoting good adjustment to the separation from home. Said differently, children who feel forced to spend a certain amount of time away from home are more likely to become intensely homesick.

Of course, Goldilocks didn’t get it all right. After all, she broke into someone else’s house without permission, a fact not taken lightly by the three bears. Camp has an entirely different premise. Not only are the chairs, meals and beds perfect for kids of all shapes and sizes, the staff will welcome their presence and work diligently to help them feel part of the family.

Enjoy the summer!

Dr. Christopher Thurber

As a Camp Director, I understand the value that parents are giving their children by allowing them a camp experience. As a father, I was a little nervous sending my child away to camp for the first time. My wife and I researched and found the right camp for our daughter and then it was time to help her make the transition to time away from home and prepare for camp. Here are some things that we did to help her prepare for an amazing camp experience.

Packing

Pack for camp with your child. You can start the process a week or two before camp. Packing for camp can be a great opportunity to discuss what camp will be like and how much fun they are going to have. It is also a way to develop decision making skills based on your child’s maturity level. When our daughter wanted to bring her new tennis shoes to camp, we could have just said no. Instead, we asked her questions, “What kind of activities will you wear the tennis shoes to?”  “Remember when we visited camp and you heard about the creek walk?  How do you think that will affect your shoes?” These questions allowed her to find the right decision. If your child feels a part of the decision-making process, his/her chances of having a positive experience will improve.

Packing Tips:

-          Remember that camp is a place for clothes to get dirty and sometimes lost. Thrift stores and garage sales are great for “new” camp clothes.

-          Pack clothes by day and include an extra day. (My wife puts them in sealable plastic bags with the day of the week on them)

-          Buy one new item that can only be used at camp. Pack this item first in anticipation of camp.

-          Sneak a note in their luggage telling them how much you love them and how excited you are for them to be at camp.

Talk about camp

As you are packing and getting ready for camp, make sure to talk about what it is going to be like. Ask questions like, “What do you think will be your favorite activity?” and “What do you think the food will be like?” When your child shares concerns about going away, encourage him or her to talk about these feelings, and let them know you have confidence in their ability to handle being away from home. Avoid sharing your concerns other than a typical response of, “I’m going to miss you too, but I am so excited for you.”

Camp is about development

Camp is an opportunity for your son or daughter to experience the world larger than they the one that is familiar. In addition to the fun and new experiences they will be having, they will be gaining self esteem, confidence, and learning about the outdoors. It is also an opportunity for your child and you to learn to be apart. Positive separation allows children to develop autonomy and a stronger sense of self, make new friends, develop new social skills, learn about teamwork, and more. This time also allows parents an opportunity to take care of themselves, so that they will feel refreshed when their child returns home.

As parents, we have the opportunity to work with camps to help raise our children to be creative, confident, successful adults.  Thanks for being a part of the camp community and have a great summer!

Kurt Podeszwa

Once you and your children have chosen a camp that matches their interests and abilities, a crucial next step is getting ready physically. Following the guidelines below will help ensure a healthy, happy experience.

1. Camps are physically active places, even for differently-abled campers. Engaging in some pre-camp fun and physical activities will help your children get the most out of the summer ahead. If your children do not participate in organized sports, then go on some hikes together, join a pick-up game of basketball, play catch in the back yard, or frequent the municipal swimming pool. Anything you can do to help your children gear up to the physicality of the camp experience will be of great benefit once camp starts.
2. If you have explored a preparatory resource such as The Summer Camp Handbook, then you have familiarized yourself with the camp’s activities. Either way, you should gain a good sense of the physical demands of your chosen camp. Now is the perfect time to take your children for a physical exam or other health evaluations. Speak to your health care provider about the camp’s various activities and verify that they are fit and ready to take part in activities. You might ask questions such as:

• Does he need new glasses or sports glasses?
• Is the leg she injured this winter ready for mountain hikes?
• What can we do to prevent another bout of swimmer’s ear?

If your child has a chronic medical condition, such as asthma or an allergy, your conversation with a health care provider takes on added importance. Discuss with your child:

• restrictions or modifications to activities
• ongoing treatments or preventive measures, such as carrying a rescue inhaler or avoiding certain foods

Your goal is to make your children as self-reliant as possible, so that they can participate in the fullest range of activities.

It is essential that you complete and return the camp’s health form, and write a supplement that describes all of your child’s emotional or physical needs. At times, parents are reluctant to be candid on the camp’s health form because they are concerned about:

• the information not being kept confidential
• the camp staff unfairly discriminating against their child

Some parents are unaware of the importance of detailed health forms to camp staff who act as summer surrogate parents.

High quality camps will treat any personal information about your children with great discretion, informing only those persons who need to know (e.g., the camp nurse and your child’s counselors); no high quality camp will label your children or discriminate against them. So please inform the camp if one or more of your children take medication, have a history of emotional or behavioral problems, was recently hospitalized, or responds best to a certain kind of treatment.

Simply put: Don’t make the camp staff try to figure out what may have taken you years to understand about your children. Instead, give the staff the advantage of your parental insights and experience. This puts them in the best possible position to offer support.

Although a cornerstone of the camping experience-day or resident-is the absence of parents, in no way does it involve the absence of camp caregivers. Quite the contrary: High quality camping experiences require a trusting partnership between parents and the camp staff. For more information about physical and medical preparation for camp, read The Summer Camp Handbook.

Enjoy the summer!

Dr. Christopher Thurber

For additional parent resources, visit: SummerCampHandbook.com
Learn about high quality staff training at: ExpertOnlineTraining.com